Charlie We're Getting Too High!
Saturday night I went with my best friend to see "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory". I love that movie! I have seen it at least 500 times and I have it on tape, but it was playing at the Alabama Theater, so we shelled out the $6 to go see it again. I love going to see movies at the Alabama Theater, but each time I do I realize that I need to get there late. We went to dinner before the movie and we were afraid we were going to be late. My friend kicked back that margarita like a champ and I nearly choked on my Quesadilla. We just couldn't be late for the movie! It was going to start at 7:00 and we were still in Hoover at 6:30. Anyway, we get out of there and rush to the theater, scramble to find a parking spot and walk through the doors at 3 til 7:00. We got seated and were proud of the fact that we got there on time. That's when it happened! The organ player started up and insisted the audience join him in a sing-a-long. Bloody hell! The songs for the evening were "Supercallafragalistickexpealidoshis" (Yeah, like you could spell that either) "Mickey Mouse Club" and some other cheesy song that has slipped my mind at the moment. I lost it when the audience started screaming in unison-"Mickey Mouse! Donald Duck!" I am not a fan of sing-a-longs. If our kids had been there I wouldn't have minded so much, but we were all alone in this madness. To make matters worse I had inhaled my Quesadilla to get here on time and acquired a massive case of heartburn. So all through the movie I got to retaste the lovely chicken and cheese.YUMMY!!! I went there to see a Christmas movie last year and they pulled that crap then too. The really bad part was I was on a date with this ultra whitebred guy who started singing along with the crowd as loud as he could. I thought he was about to bust out into the "Carlton" right in the middle of "Rudolph". I could feel myself sliding further and further down in my chair. Where is that big hole to swallow you when you need it? The lessons for the day are as follows:
1) Show up late to avoid sing-a-longs
2) If you see your friend popping Pepcids before a meal, follow the leader
145 Comments:
nothing like a little anti-acid to get the party started!
Charlie and the Cholocate Factory is one my all-time favorite movies too. It goes down in history as one of the most disturbing children's movies ever. I mean, you've got the freakish Oompa-Loompas, children being inflated into blueberries and some that are supposedly killed in the furnace... Not to mention the boat ride.. Sheesh.
Round the world and home again,
That's the sailor's way.
Faster faster, faster faster!
There's no earthly way of knowing,
Which direction we are going.
There's no knowing where we're rowing,
Or which way the river's flowing
Is it raining? Is it snowing?
Is a hurricane a-blowing?
Not a speck of light is showing,
So the danger must be growing.
Are the fires of hell a-glowing?
Is the grisly reaper mowing?
Yes, the danger must be growing,
'Cause the rowers keep on rowing!
And they're certainly not showing,
Any signs that they are slowing!
Sorry Mr.Picky Ass. We have always referred to it as either Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory OR Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. If you will notice the other two people that commented knew what I was talking about. SHEESH!
Um and that is Willy Wonka, not Willy Wanka. What kind of movie are you talking about? Willy Wanka and the Fudge Factory?
Yeah, they are making an updated movie starring Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka, which is due Summer or 2005. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was the name of the book written by Roald Dahl. Yes, Roald, not Ronald. When they decided to make it into a movie, they thought that Gene Wilder was definately the stand-out character as Willy Wonka and decided to change the title.
Did you know he wrote Matilda? James and the Giant Peach? Did you know he wrote a kid's book called Switch Bitch? Did you know that he wrote a sequel to the Chocolate Factory called Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator?
I'm sorry, but all questions must be submitted in writing.
Ouch! could someone pass Hemispheredancer a donut pillow? he just got handed his ass.
let that be a lesson to all! It's called writer's liberty.
Hmm, apparently I did something to HemisphereDancer's ass and didn't mean to. So sorry Mr. Dancer. I apologize for any undue damage I may have caused to said ass and want it to be clear that my ass ravaging was purely unintentional.
...or was it Tori with her Willy Wanka barb?
Just count yourself fortunate that you didn't wake up on the wrong side of my bed, lover.
Glad you could clear that one up, Dave. :)
have i ever mentioned that i need a helmet? i am that much of a retard. i just posted a comment to irish geisha thinking it was you. anyhoo, mrs. hutton told me that you were blogging now and i thought i would say howdy.
by the way, my bridal tea is on september 25th from 2-4 p.m. your invitation is in the mail with directions.
maybe one night we can go to wal-mart and make fun of people. wouldn't that be so HHS?
If you walk around Wal-mart for more than 15 minutes and you don't see the freak of nature...
Willy Wonka freakin' rocks!
You people are obsessing. It was just a blog. Move on.
Yeah, this post has definately grown legs. I mean 21 comments? Jesus! My whole blog doesn't have 21 comments! What is the magic elixir that was poured into this post to make people go so crazy over it? When you find out, dump a couple kilos on my blog!
No! Let's try for 100 comments! Yes! YESSSSS!!!!!
I got a dollar that says tori will never post again
Yes, I like eagles. I also like hawks and condors. What about bluejays and sparrows? They are both nice. Actually I think most all birds are good, except for, like, the finch or something. I heard the finch craps in it's own nest. It's hard to appreciate a bird that craps where it sleeps. Or maybe that was pigeons. Hmm, do pigeons make nests? Do they crap in them, or do they only crap on statues, cars and people? It's hard to appreciate a bird that craps on people - especially when that person is me - so I don't like the pigeon either.
Go nuthatches!
Ok people, break it up. Nothing to see here. This is a blog, not a chatroom.
Irish Geisha owes us all a dollar! Yipeeee! Oh what will I buy?? Maybe a life!
Of all the blogs in all the world, you pick mine to set up camp. I feel so loved. Now move on.
Oh Jesus, please bring them back to the Chocolate Factory!!!!
He was prolly banging that Veruca Salt chick. I know I would be... um... when she was, like... um 10 years older and stuff.
That wasn't Veruca Salt! That was Violet Beauregarde. Get your Wonka facts straight, man! Veruca felt down the Bad Egg Chute.
That should be "fell down", not "felt down". Still got the gutter mind obviously from my earlier Veruca Salt molestation comment. Can't fight the seether.
nothing like a little midget porn to get the party started!
Says you, sucka! It's LIVESSSSS!
I'm calling it guys. Time of death 9:36 am. It lived a good life.
Haven't you learned an important life lesson from Reanimator? Frankenstein? Night of the Living Dead? You can't kill that which is undead.
ok. I give up. It's dead.
I would have to say - with little threat of being incorrect...
...that 50 posts is totally doable.
I would even go so far as to say 51....
yeah, well I still hate you all, so THERE.
Now, now let's not be a hater. Just write about crap like movies and midget porn and they come flocking around.
56.. Booyah!
Oh and thanks for inviting me to see the movie. Appreciate that.
I didn't figure you and Irish would put the claws away long enough to watch the movie. Sorry. Maybe next time.
Hey, I can't help it that Irish is the grudgemaster 2000. She should try to look back at any event in the past and catch a little clue that not everything was all Rush's fault. I tried telling her countless times during and after our relationship that there was no great Wendy conspiracy, but SHE NEVER LISTENED. She also obviously sucks at math and the calculation of time or she'd realize that Wendy and I didn't even start dating until MONTHS AND MONTHS after we broke up. She seems to be diluted to the point of thinking that I shirked her off for Wendy and that was and has never been the case. Maybe if she could allow herself to clearly recall the last month of our dating, she would be able to fathom that there was more going on there and none of it had anything to do with Wendy. Yes, I'm with Wendy now, but what was I supposed to do? Join the monestary because we broke up? Life goes on, baby.
In truth, I care about Irish greatly. I love her still even to this day and I truly hate the fact that we destroyed a wonderful friendship with a really REALLY great relationship that ended poorly. I would give nothing in the world for the time we had together, it didn't work out, so she needs to catch the fucking net and try growing up just a little bit. She wants to be inflective? She should try being serious in her examinations and stop rose-tinting her own self-image. She is at fault sometimes. She wants to be the master of her own destiny and...
**inhale**
Sorry... and be master of her own destiny? Well that takes more than this "It's not me, it's you" attitude she has. Yes, I broke it off with her. So...what? It wasn't working. We had fun. We had a lot of fun. We laughed, we hung out and ... we had a lot of fun. That doesn't mean I didn't love her. That doesn't mean that I don't love her still. That means that I was man enough to say it wasn't working out and got out. Was that right of me to do? Not entirely. What she won't accept is I just came out of a 30-year hellish ordeal with a girl that I grew more and more resentful of, and I didn't want that to happen with us. Did I think Irish and I would be chummy after the breakup? No, but I also didn't think that she'd be squatting to take a piss on my grave when I die.
Grudge much, Irish?
Nah nah nah nah -
Nah nah nah nah nah,
Nah nah nah...
I'm here for ya. My comments live on!
70 POSTS!! WHOOOOOOOOOOO!! If you have nowhere to post, you can always come post on my blog. hint hint.
Maybe I shoudl just post one a day! Here's 71!
Oh no! This is about to slip into the archives! His it quickly while it's still on the main page!!
73! Come on!! Gotta hit 100!!
I dunno. The last twenty almost need to be meaningful posts. I hate to just could, like 81...
82...
83...
I mean that just seems to cheaper the experience.
Oops, I meant to say "count", not "could".
My bad.
Où est le drame quand vous avez besoin de lui?
Since this is my post I think it's only fair...
...that I post #90.
Oui. Très vrai.
I would just like to say thank you to everyone that stood behind me and took me to 100 when everyone said it couldn't be done. I want to give a shout out to my peeps. Thanks mom and dad for making me what I am today. (Music breaking in) OH! There's just so many people to thank. I hope I'm not leaving anyone out...(cut to commercial)
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Damn it! I screwed up my 100th post and it flipped me to 101. Oh well. What's one more for the record books.
I know. It's like getting to run with the Olympic torch and biffing it right at the finish line, hurling the torch into a pool of water and watching it fizzle out as thousands gasp in unison. Well, maybe not just like that, but you get the point.
Yeah all those people who said it "couldn't be done" was... you, wasn't it? As a matter of fact, you tried to stifle the motion to go to 100, didn't you Senator Kerry? Now you're flip-flopping and saying that you were for the motion to move towards 100? Which one is it? Are you pro-100 or anti-100? How can you claim to be pro-100 when you voted against the bill to take this post to 100 comments? I'm afraid I don't understand your logic, sir.
um...shut up dude.
You, sir, are no John F. Kennedy.
108! WOOT! It never ends!
Stop digging in my attic!
200 sounds totally doable.
Especially since posts in the attic have to follow no rules of politeness.
I mean, theoretically we could have each new sentence in a new comment.
each
new
word.
Or we could even speak in riddles and code to make it interesting.
Sorry. Don't have any examples.
I turn my back for one second and you guys are putting on my old clothes and laughing at my high school pictures! I see you can not be left alone in my attic.
I'm all for having goals, but.....come on.
That last commment made me sick for multiple reasons.
Oh and you code means that College football will no longer be shown on NBC.
that should say "your", not "you"
Just thought I'd clear that up.
borken link, eh? I hate borken links!
132 Comments! Still going like the Energizer bunny!
Boom boom boom boom boom boom
Lunacy.
Holy Trojan horse, Batman! Ribbit!
haha. Batman and Ribbit
I thought I was the only one circling this dying topic like a vulture.
Oh, and Monk wasn't here, for what that's worth.
Not that he hasn't been here before, tho.
Oh wait. He hasn't been.
Look my precious, we have visitors! It's been so long that we thought you were never coming back. We missed you all so much.
Nasty little commentses. How we hates them.
Believe me, there is nothing deep about this post anymore.
Still going!
*Energizer Bunny marches by*
oooh look i came to post. now i will sing you a song, "oh i wish i was a little bar of soap.
oh i wish i was a little bar of soap.
i'd go slippy and slidey over everybody's hidey,
oh i wish i were a little bar of soap."
all together now!
No boobs please. Seen most of em, don't care to see the others. (Related to some)
Get over it already!
so here i am at 160. nice.
to commemorate the occassion i will sing another little ditty:
oh i wish i was little english sparrow
oh i wish i was a little english sparrow
i'd sitty on a steeple and shitty on the people
oh i wish i was a little english sparrow
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I know it's childish, but Charlie is my baby and some things need to stay drama free.
Are we not at 200 posts yet? Jeez.
I mean it really is gonna finally take someone with gonads to get the job done.
Does anyone happen to know anyone that has some gonads?
No. Well leave it to Rush then.
Atleast we're up to 170 comments now. That has to count for something. I mean, maybe it's a new Blogger record. Who knows?
Actually, we're not even close to the record, if there is one. I was on the Zach Braff Blog the other day and he averaged about 1100 comments per post. Of course, he's semi-famous.
And though you're cool, you're not famous.
Actually, you don't have to be famous to be cool... or is it you don't have to be cool to be famous? Hmmm... either one I guess works.
I mean you've got nearly 200 posts! What else do you want?
ok, ok... To be famous would be cool too... Or to be cool would be famous... I'm confused now.
Oh boyeeee! Just 20 more to go...
Well, 19 more now.
AND ONE!!
Thanks guys! Couldn't have done it without ya!
Too bad you guys are the only one's to get it up this high. We could have been to 1000 by now if everyone would contribute to the cause.
Step it up people.
Want
1000
and
I
want
NOW!!!!!!!!
Tori you're a bad egg!
Oh boy! Are we acting out scenes from the movie? I wanna be Willy Wonka!
Oompa-loompa, oompa-di-di,
If you are smart you will listen to me.
Ooopma-loompa, oompa-di-do,
Don't ask for 1000, when 500 will do.
And it tastes like pot roast.
218 you fuckers!bwahaha.
oh, and I HEART RUSH!
Rush HEARTS midgets, pie, and crisping foil... but elizabeth can bite it to the hilt.
Wanna see MY willy wonka? or has that joke already been done? this list is WAY WAY beyond my attention span. even scrolling gave me a headache.
My random letters were "ocbzlgm"
are you sure you want me to contribute to this? Ask Zaron. I'm notorious for very long comments.
What is a Zaron, anyway. I remember Chip, Polaris III, but not Zaron. He wasn't in The Fridge or Flies Like Us.
Random letters: kzygsmc
I love being on painkillers. It helps me remember 1991-1997
Random letters: yfiuhkgs
I think that sums it up nicely
Or maybe oaylyk, the random image for this comment.
OK this will make it an even 225
xybhh
My nuts itch.
Yes, I posted that as a comment on my sister's blog... WHAT??!?
nothing like a little anti-acid to get the party started!
Charlie and the Cholocate Factory is one my all-time favorite movies too. It goes down in history as one of the most disturbing children's movies ever. I mean, you've got the freakish Oompa-Loompas, children being inflated into blueberries and some that are supposedly killed in the furnace... Not to mention the boat ride.. Sheesh.
Round the world and home again,
That's the sailor's way.
Faster faster, faster faster!
There's no earthly way of knowing,
Which direction we are going.
There's no knowing where we're rowing,
Or which way the river's flowing
Is it raining? Is it snowing?
Is a hurricane a-blowing?
Not a speck of light is showing,
So the danger must be growing.
Are the fires of hell a-glowing?
Is the grisly reaper mowing?
Yes, the danger must be growing,
'Cause the rowers keep on rowing!
And they're certainly not showing,
Any signs that they are slowing!
Random letters are nzles
Did Snoop make this word verification software?
Fo shizzle, my nizzle, it's the rizzle dizzle.
USELESS FACT: Remember Joey? His Birthday is September 13th.
Remember Animaniacs? They premiered on Fox Kid's Netowrk September 13th, 1993
Random letters:llikbl
I'm not going there...
And now, a poem:
All right stop Collaborate and listen Ice is back with my brand new invention Something grabs a hold of me tightly Then I flow that a harpoon daily and nightly Will it ever stop? Yo--I don't know Turn off the lights and I'll glow To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle. Dance Bum rush the speaker that booms I'm killin your brain like a poisonous mushroom Deadly, when I play a dope melody Anything less that the best is a felony Love it or leave it You better gain way You better hit bull's eye The kid dont play If there was a problem Yo, I'll solve it Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it
Now that the party is jumping With the bass kicked in, the Vegas are pumpin' Quick to the point, to the point no faking I'm cooking MC's like a pound of bacon Burning them if they're not quick and nimble I go crazy when I hear a cymbal And a hi hat with a souped up tempo I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo Rollin in my 5.0 With my ragtop down so my hair can blow The girlies on standby Waving just to say HI Did you stop? No--I just drove by Kept on pursuing to the next stop I busted a left and I'm heading to the next block That block was dead Yo--so I continued to A1A Beachfront Ave. Girls were hot wearing less than bikinis Rockman lovers driving Lamborghinis Jealous 'cause I'm out getting mine Shay with a guage and Vanilla with a nine Reading for the chumps on the wall The Chumps are acting ill because they're so full of eight balls Gunshots ranged out like a bell I grabbed my nine-- All I heard were shells Fallin on the concrete real fast Jumped in my car, slammed on the gas Bumper to bumper the avenue's packed I'm tryin to get away before the jackers jacke Police on the scene You know what I mean They passed me up, confronted all the dope fiends If there was a problem Yo, I'll solve it Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it
Take heed, 'caese I'm a lyrical poet Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it My town, that created all the bass sound Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground 'Cause my style's like a chemical spill Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel Conducted and formed This is a hell of a concept We make it hype and you want to step with this Shay palays on the fade, slice it like a ninja Cut like a razor blade so fast Other DJ's say, "Damn" If my rhyme was a drug I'd sell it by the gram Keep my composure when it's time to get loose Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice If there was a problem Yo--I'll solve it! Check out the hook while Deshay revolves it
Yo man--let's get out of here! Word to your mother!
You can't touch THAT!
Forget the anti-acid. Nothing like Vanilla Ice to turn this mutha out.
237 bitches... It lives!!!
PS - This is Rush.
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