Better You Than Me

I have decided to follow the ultra depressing story with a very humorous one. So, the other day I was walking through the shopping center that I work, on my way to grab a soda. About half way to my destination I heard a man yelling,"Ma'am! Ma'am!" I turned around to see an elderly woman walking across the parking lot. She looked like the typical Great-Grandmother type. That's right, Great-Grandmother. She was shuffling across the lot holding her little Granny bag and smiling the whole way. She was wearing the normal Granny gear. Long skirt, sweater, orthopedic shoes...you get the point. Anyway, there was a man about 10 feet behind her grinning from ear too ear, trying to get this lady's attention. I didn't want to stare at the situation, but curiosity got the best of me. I stopped and watched as the events unfolded. As the man approached this sweet little old lady, she turned around to face him. There it was. This sweet little lady had tucked her skirt into her panties. Only they were not normal Granny panties...Oh no. They were THONGS!!!!!! Yep, thongs. Ol' girl was sporting some pretty sexy thongs under that skirt. She had left the house with what she thought was a sexy secret and ended up showing the whole parking lot. The man had noticed and was kind enough to tell her. So, if it had been me, I would have slinked away to my car and sped off never to return to that spot again. Not her. She smiled, pulled the dress out of her crack and politely thanked him. Then she continued on her snail like pace. I guess when you live to be 90 you couldn't give a shit if your ass is hanging out or not. You're just glad to be alive. Nevertheless, my eyes will never completely heal, but the doctor says my nervous tick will subside in time.