And the Award Goes To...

Yesterday my wonderful coworker decided to play a practical joke on me. In her head it was the funniest gag ever, but to me it was 30 years off my life. Allow me to explain. I have a pen that is my favorite pen in the whole world. Granted I just got it a few days ago, but I love this pen. It writes like butter! Anyway, I came into work yesterday morning and the pen is gone. I told the coworker about it and she said one of our patients probably took it the night before. So, later that afternoon, she decided to go out and get the mail out of the box, which is a daily thing. When she came in, she handed me the mail because I was waiting on something to be delivered. Mixed in with the ususal bills and magazines was a wrinkled envelope, unsealed, and addressed to me with no return address. I pulled out a piece of paper that looked like a ransom letter. (Several different style letters put together to form a word.) I don't remember exactly what it said, due to trauma, but it went something like this:

Mommy,
How could you leave me with those bad people? You knew they would hurt me.

Blah, Blah, Blah....you get the point. I freaked the fuck out. I saw my life flash before my eyes, I got dizzy, I felt like I was going to puke! All I could picture was someone had taken my baby and they were doing God knows what to him as I read this sick letter. A million horrible things flashed in my head in 2 seconds. Immediately, I ran to the phone and started to dial my ex-husband's number. He is with him this weekend and at this point I hadn't seen or heard from him in 2 days. That's when Miss Funnyass grabbed me and told me it was a joke. She thought I would understand that it was a ransom letter from my pen, which she had taken earlier in the day. Being a mommy and having a ransom letter addressed to..."MOMMY" I didn't see the humor. She has now been deemed "World's Worst Practical Joker".